Yes! ...and having done so, you might feel the Earth kiss each of your toes in gratitude for being present with it. The Earth loves conscious presence. You may hear it remind you that so long as you are present, it will always be there to nourish your spirit, soul, body and mind. That it will always be a platform that scaffolds your cycles of transformation, growth, and decay. That amid anxious attempts to control all that is impermanent, it just Exists like a pillar of resilience, authority, tenderness and beauty...until some day when it won't be any longer. But it doesn't mind its own impermanence and humans don't know when what is will cease to be. And the Earth isn't worried. It only asks that we be here, now.
A practice of meditation and mindful awareness can be influential parts of eating disorder recovery. I know that they were for me. Sometimes, when the mind is too wild and mental or physical activation make it too difficult to sit and follow the breath, a walking meditation can be particularly helpful. Moving our physical body very slowly and intentionally can inspire the mind the follow suit. Bearing witness to each step and encouraging the mind to return to physical sensations that happen during a walk can inspire a person to remind him/herself to shift the mind back to the present moment again, and again, and again. One of the reasons why this is so important in eating disorder recovery is that the anxious eating disorder mind can become a whirl-wind; like a fearful spin-cycle. A mindfulness practice can remind a mind that is focusing on the past and future to come back to the now. Presence is the balm that soothes the voice that incessently says: "I'm apprehensive, what-if, I should, I'm scared, what-if, I should..." To practice returning to the present moment when the mind is not cycling can help to reground when the cycling actually does happen. While it might feel ideal to do a walking meditation in a labyrinth or under the warm sun, a walking meditation can really be done anywhere and at any time.
A practice of meditation and mindful awareness can be influential parts of eating disorder recovery. I know that they were for me. Sometimes, when the mind is too wild and mental or physical activation make it too difficult to sit and follow the breath, a walking meditation can be particularly helpful. Moving our physical body very slowly and intentionally can inspire the mind the follow suit. Bearing witness to each step and encouraging the mind to return to physical sensations that happen during a walk can inspire a person to remind him/herself to shift the mind back to the present moment again, and again, and again. One of the reasons why this is so important in eating disorder recovery is that the anxious eating disorder mind can become a whirl-wind; like a fearful spin-cycle. A mindfulness practice can remind a mind that is focusing on the past and future to come back to the now. Presence is the balm that soothes the voice that incessently says: "I'm apprehensive, what-if, I should, I'm scared, what-if, I should..." To practice returning to the present moment when the mind is not cycling can help to reground when the cycling actually does happen. While it might feel ideal to do a walking meditation in a labyrinth or under the warm sun, a walking meditation can really be done anywhere and at any time.
I can't echo these sentiments enough. I have found when my mindfulfness practice ceased I fell into the traps of my eating disorder again. It is so necessary to keep myself grounded and less anxious. It is so necessary for me to keep my mind in the present moment or I take myself off the path. It's amazing what we learn along this journey we call recovery.
ReplyDeleteI wholeheartedly agree with you. As we both learned during our processes, the eating disorder never exists in the present moment. The ED and parts that orient around it create judgmental thoughts about our bodies, the food, our lives, our worthiness etc. in order to help us avoid painful emotional scenarios that are rooted in our pasts. Of course, they have an honorable and protective function for existing in the first place. And they helped us get through some tough stuff. But, in the end, recovery is all about taking self-leadership, which I think is really synonymous with mindful presence. You've got me going... :)
ReplyDeleteSometimes it's crucial to talk about the past so that we can understand why we learned to live with certain rules so we can work towards shifting the way that we narrate our lives into something that is more compassionate. But most of the time, being present is the most healing remedy for a painful past.
A few weeks ago we were talking about the impossibility of recovering via the old rules (i.e. the overworking, the perfectionism, etc.), and I think that failing to engage in a mindfulness and meditation practice is a huge part of the "old rules." It goes against the incessant value of doing, doing, doing, doing ad nauseum, which is central in our culture. Brene Brown says that when people start attending "Over-Doing-Annonymous," we'll have to rent out stadiums. Sad and true. I think that living in a culture that is characterized by mindless thinking and doing is one of the reasons why its so hard to sustain recovery once a person (i.e. me...you...us, haha) has left treatment. And I'm certainly not saying that I'm perfect at it; gosh, sometimes I struggle with letting go of the over-thinking and over-doing on a moment-to-moment basis. A lot of the time, when I try to challenge it, I end up feeling overwhelming shame. Outside of treatment, who gives our minds permission to take it easy on us? We have to. Allowing ourselves to connect to the present moment is giving ourselves that permission.
But, It's so hard. And I don't want to minimize that. Western culture is addicted to thinking and doing, so it's hard to live here and deal with food, money, work, school, and day-to-day responsibilities and still practice loving-kindness, self-patience, self-compassion, and intentional presence. It's a major grey area. It's also helpful to remind ourselves that we live in a world where there are enormous amounts of people who are devoting themselves to self-love, love, and a daily mindfulness practice. My current stuck point is forgetting about the compassionate people, and instead worrying about the people who might judge me for not being able to do it all and have it done 5 days ago. The remedy that works for me is the present moment. It's magical in its simplicity, and I really love to chat with you about it! Love to know that I'm surrounded by women like you, women who are brilliant, courageous, and strong.